Kyllr Kervs #187 

Interview by Meat Candy # 72

MC: You have been with the league long time? What has kept you motivated all this time?

KK: My two-year derbyversary is coming up in May. My main motivation for the past two years has been to prove to myself and others in my life that I am stronger and better than I thought, that I can do this crazy thing. Negative forces in my life have told me I’m no good at sports, but finally I can prove to myself that it just isn’t true.

MC: What was your new skater day like? If you could jump into the TARDIS and go back to that day and tell yourself something, what would you say?

KK: My new skater day was so scary! There were so many people and I wasn’t sure I had what it took. I remember trying to do my first four point fall and ending up on my butt some how. It really hurt and made me question what I was doing. If I could steal the TARDIS for a day I would go tell myself that I can do it and that the negative voices are liars. I would say, “T-stops are the devil but you really, really need to practice them! I promise you’ll thank me later!” Then I’d have the Doctor take me back to the present and he would scrimmage with us!

MC: What changes have you noticed in yourself since you started derby? 

KK: I am way more outgoing than I would have ever thought I could be. I have the best friends ever now and know I will always have someone to hang out with or talk to. I look forward to social gatherings instead of having anxiety. I have learned to love myself and see myself as strong; I am slowly learning to love my body and what it can do instead of hating it and wishing it was thinner, better, what have you. I’m more willing to try new things, but I still freak out about it a bit. I’m still terrified by spiders though!

MC: When do you feel most confident? When you feel less confident, what sort of self-talk gets you out of that place and back into awesome?

KK: When I land a good hit or hold a jammer back I feel like I could do anything. When I don’t feel so hot, I try to think of the good things I have done recently and try to envision how things will be with more practice. I tell myself that I am Kyllr and some day I’ll be that blocker that everyone is scared of.

MC: What sort of outside support do you get? How does your family get into derby?

KK: Some co-workers go to bouts every now and then and might ask about derby but don’t really know what I’m talking about. My mom went to one bout when I first started and she seemed to enjoy it but thinks it’s too violent and doesn’t understand why I would want to be involved with that. My dad is very supportive but he lives out of town so he hasn’t had much interaction with it. We talk about it a lot and he’s excited to see my first bout some day. I’m sure he’s secretly scared I’ll break myself though.

MC: What celebrity would you want to play Kyllr in your derby biography? What song would have to be on the soundtrack?

KK:  I think I’d rather have a cartoon version of me, a brunet version of Harley Quinn! My main song for my soundtrack would have to be  “A Kiss With A Fist” by Florence and the Machine, and pretty much any pumped up, powerful female vocal songs.

AmyZing Disgrace #80085

Interview by Emma D’MolisHer

ED:  When did you join STDD and what initially piqued your interest into doing roller derby? 

AD: I joined Sick Town about 6 months ago, although I’d wanted to start years sooner. I was hesitant not only because of my inability to skate, but primarily because the sport scared the heck out of me!  I didn’t think I’d ever have the kahunas to do it, but luckily, Pwny is one hell of a recruiter!

ED: What do you like/love most about roller derby?  Is there anything you dislike about it?

AD: I hate this question only because I never know where to begin!  I love the constant challenge of learning moves/maneuvers, the bouts, the crazy-fun clothes we get to wear, the rockin’ bod you get from the sport, the satisfaction you feel watching yourself evolve into a real skater, the fulfillment you get by being a part of something so special, but most of all, I love the sense of community.  The girls in Sick Town are amazingly supportive and caring; it’s like having a second family.  I’ve never felt so accepted in my entire life.  So what do I dislike about it?  Besides the possibility of injuring myself and being rendered unable to play, nothing.

ED: Where do you see yourself (with STDD) in six months?  One year?

AD: My goal is to start playing for the Dis-Orderlies in the next 6-12 months.  Then eventually SMASH unit.  Then….THE WORLD!!

ED: What do you like to do when you aren’t on skates?  (hobbies, interests?)

AD: There’s a world outside of derby?!?!? J/K.  I’m a dork and so I’ve got dorky hobbies.  I love puzzling, making sock monsters, watching awesomely bad movies with my friends, assembling/sewing costumes, playing video games & board games, and animal husbandry.

ED: What advice do you have for beginners?  What advice were you given as a beginner that you value most?

AD: Try to stay positive and not get discouraged in the early days.  It can be intimidating as hell when you don’t know what you’re doing and you get thrown into the rink with all of these amazing skater who just fly by you.  We’ve all been there and I promise with hard work and determination, it really does pay off….  Just be prepared to take a lot of falls in the meantime!  Also!  Bumsavers.  Get them!  You will not regret it!  They have literally saved my ass dozens of times!

ED: If you could describe roller derby to someone who didn’t know anything about it, what would you tell them? 

AD: A lot of people see it as a really aggressive and violent sport, but I think it’s just the opposite.  The girls are respectful and supportive of each other and are always mindful of the other players.  They’re aware of their surroundings and their fellow skaters at all times, making sure to take extra caution not to injure one another.

Beginner of the Month - Vanessa

By Blood Stain # .370

BS: You are a skater, a highly involved volunteer for Sick Town and you have a daughter (Mouv’ Fasta) who is awesome and a part of the JR Derby team the Candy Stripers. How do you juggle all those hats?

VE: Yes, I’m very busy with work, derby, volunteering as an NSO, and being a single mom of a Candy Striper skater and a very active three-year old boy. I couldn’t do it without the help of my daughter, Mouv’ Fasta. She babysits her brother so I can attend practice and has been super supportive and encouraging every step of the way.

BS: What has derby brought to you? Does it inspire you in other parts of your life?

VE: STRENGTH! Every time I put on my skates I get stronger. Of course my muscles are getting stronger, and my endurance is building. It’s awesome to see physical changes like that. But more importantly, I’ve noticed huge changes in the strength of my character. I feel more tenacious and confident, and I have a greater overall feeling of well-being. Those qualities definitely translate into every part of my life.

BS: How does it feel to be in the same league as your daughter? How AWESOME is that!?!?

VE: It’s pretty amazing to be able to share this experience with her. We talk derby all the time. And she’s the one who got me into volunteering as an NSO. I had so much fun the night Mouv’ Fasta trained me to do score-keeping that I’ve been coming back ever since.

BS: If you were asked to pick a skate out song, that expressed who you were as a skater, what would it be and why?

VE: “Heart It Races” by Architecture in Helsinki. It’s joyful, quirky and eclectic, like me, and sometimes I listen to it on repeat in the car all the way to derby practice!

BS: If you had a super natural power what would it be and why?

VE: I think an awesome roller derby super power would be a magic wand that could take the stink out of the foulest derby gear!

BS: What is the craziest/awesome moment you have had since joining Sick Town?

VE: Definitely the day my work mates surprised me with a brand new pair of skates. I couldn’t afford to buy skates when I first started roller derby and was using this janky pair of old hand me downs that were obviously holding me back. My friend at work, Mary, did some research and talked to some of the trainers on the sly to figure out what kind of skates to get. She collected money from everyone at work and even tracked down my Mom and sister on Facebook! The day they gave them to me all wrapped up at a work potluck I was blown away! It was totally unexpected and SO touching to see that all of these people cared so much!

Blood Stain Brettaigne # .370

Interview by Shankee Doodle # 13

SD: Tell me a little about Brettaigne and Blood Stain; How do they differ from one another?

BS: I am a Scorpio, which explains me to a tee! I am the best friend you will ever have and the worst enemy. As far as a difference between Brettaigne and Blood Stain, I would say they don’t differ at all. They are me. I am always competitive and a team player. I also like to hit people whenever possible!

SD: How did you get into roller derby?

BS: I needed something more in my life. I just didn’t know what. I was talking with a friend back home, (Whitefish Montana) telling her how I was looking for something. She had helped start a league back there and told me I would love it! She Googled it and found Sick Town for me. I ended up sending an email and going to a new skater day and I have been addicted ever since!!!

SD: What do you remember from your very first bout?

BS: My first bout was actually at The Big O last year. We were playing Sac City and I remember going out on the track and being hit by this chick so hard that I peed my booty shorts a little bit. Hey, it happens!!

SD: If you had a time machine, where/when would you visit and why?

BS: If I had a time machine I would go back to when my dad was still alive. He passed when I was 20. I would go back to that time and spend every moment I could with him. It’s been almost ten years and I still miss him so much. He was a great man and I know he would love him some Derby!!!

LETS PLAY!  “Would you rather…”

Live forever on a tropical island or on snowy mountains?

I would rather live forever on a tropical island. I hate being cold!

Eat a stick of butter or snort a tablespoon of salt?

I would rather eat the stick of butter because the burn of salt up my noise would hurt more then the butter making me puke from being just gross!

Be 4’5 or 7’7

I would rather be 7’7. I have always wanted to be taller!!

Have eyeballs the size of golf balls or teeth the size of computer keys?

I would rather have eyes the size of golf balls.

Not be able to shower or bathe for one whole month or not be able to brush your teeth for 6 whole months?

I would rather not be able to shower for a month. I can’t go to sleep unless I have brushed my teeth!!

Have to spend a day wearing underwear filled with syrup or wearing underwear filled with gravel?

I will take the gravel because we have all had a little sand in our pants from time to time!!

La Mad Adora # 5150

Interview by Meat Candy

MC: Describe your first taste of derby as if it were a snack food.

MAD: My first taste of derby as a snack food would be something of a sweet and salty mix. Like chocolate covered nuts. Once I got a taste of the sweet goodness, mixed in with the crunchy saltiness… well I was hooked. I even go through withdrawal symptoms if I haven’t been able to have it for a while due to whatever circumstances. Simply put, I’m addicted to derby’s sweet salty nuts.

MC: Tell me about La Mad Adora within. Where does she come from?

MAD: La Mad Adora comes from a few sides of me. It originally spawned from the creation of my jello wrestling character. I wanted to incorporate my Spanish roots/culture and channel that theatrical and fierce production that goes along with bullfighting. I’ve always admired matadors…the elaborate and gorgeous costumes, the graceful movements of their fight, their courage, and the beautiful art of human vs beast to the climax of death. After jello wresting, I realized just how “right” it felt, so I finally decided that this should be my derby name (after about 8 months of indecision and trying on other names lol). Matadora literally means female killer in Spanish (from “matar” which means to kill). In fact, it has only been in recent times that they have allowed women to bullfight around the world. I broke it down to make a name Using “La” like a title, “Mad” to incorporate my sometimes short fused temper or rather crazy side – we all go a little mad sometimes , also my love of the Mad hatter from Alice in Wonderland. Finally, the Adora part to complete the “matadora” sound….also one of my favorite childhood characters: Adora, Princess of Power aka She-ra! My derby number 5150 is the California (my birthplace) police code for crazy one on the loose, danger to property, danger to others, and danger to themselves. It’s also the title of a Van Halen album…gotta have a little rock ‘n roll connection too! Every part of my derby name and number has a piece of me in it

MC: You have real life and derby life. How you juggle it all?

MAD: Managing real life and derby has been and continues to be an interesting and exciting journey. Derby came along in my life when I needed it most. It has actually shaped my real life by igniting my passions, my career, amazing life long friendships, and it has even brought love into my life again. So there definitely has been crossover, maybe even more so than the average derby girl. I would have not been introduced back in radio and working at KLOO if it weren’t for derby. I also would not have met all of the incredible people that I now can’t picture my life without, including my wives, boyfriend and other friends. Derby has changed my life. Granted it’s not always easy. I’m having to juggle being a single parent, jobs (yes, more than one), limited finances, and other responsibilities on top of derby. However, despite all of the challenges and everything that I have to balance, I can honestly say that I’ve never been happier or felt so blessed. I know derby doesn’t always have this kind of impact on everyone, but I for one will always be grateful for what it has brought into my life…opportunity, friendships, and love.

MC: You have so many derby wives! What’s that connection all about?

MAD: Ha! Yeah, I guess I do have a lot of wives. I love them all so hard….Cruel, Slam, Krush, Asster, and Rocket. I guess the connecting factor is our strong spirits and love of derby. We’re warriors, each in our own way, and have bonded into a tribe of women that would do anything for each other. I’m sure we were a force in another life as well. It’s hard to explain how the evolution of what the wives group is today came into being….it’s a great legend that entails adventure, crisis, sacrifice, loyalty, love, and numerous derby after parties. I’m just incredibly grateful to have them in my life. With Rocket in Portland now, it’s hard to sometimes all get together at once, but we do make wife time throughout the year. I’m super excited to have Cruel and Slam skating again, and looking forward to Krush and Asster returning someday when they’re ready.

MC: Your derby future looks like…..

MAD: My derby future looks like a big pile of….glitter! I have a lot of sparkles in my derby future – big goals, great support, and motivation to be the best I can be. I’ve encountered many obstacles that have made my derby growth a little slower than others’ (like injuries), but I don’t give up easy at all. I will work hard, keep at it, keep going, and eventually, I know I will shine and sparkle.

MC: What is the best derby advice you have ever received?

MAD: I’ve received lots of great advice, so its hard to pick one. First thing that comes to mind… STAY LOW. It’s something that helps on so many different levels, and it just may save your ass. Also, as I discovered recently, strengthen your core. Really, just strengthen your entire body….and stay low.