PB and JAM!

Are you itching for more roller derby? Of course you are!

Come see the Sick Town ladies take on Cherry City’s rookie skaters at 7 p.m. Nov. 22 (doors open at 6 p.m.). This is a Cherry City Derby Girls bout, and will take place at their venue, the Mad House (1335 Madison St. NE in Salem).

Tickets are available in advance for $10 from brownpapertickets.com or at the door for $15. Kids age 6 and under get in for $5.

See you there!

Almost not

It was the bout that almost didn’t happen.


Witha Vengence jamming

When we arrived at Cherry City’s Mad House to start setting up, the power was out. It was an extremely windy day, and Pacific Gas and Electric said it had so many outages, it couldn’t really predict when the lights would come back on. No electricity means no derby.

We had to make a final decision at 6 p.m. (when the bout was scheduled to start). Until then, we waited — chatting with teammates, reconnecting with old friends, helping each other put on scary makeup. PG&E had sent someone out, so there was hope. Just as we were about to give up and head straight to the after-party, the lights came on!

You’ve never seen 24 skaters and seven referees gear up and start rolling faster than we did. By 6:30, we were ready for the first whistle, and the game was on.

Sick Town’s home teams split into a black and a white team for this bout, with guest skaters from Cherry City (Ms. Infidel) and Lava City (Juice Nukem, Mama Natrix and Nori Spekt) joining in the fun.

The white team got off to an early lead, and maintained it throughout the bout, while the black team worked toward a comeback. At halftime, white was ahead by 20 points, but that was the closest black would come. The final score was 202 to 168, a hard-fought victory for the white team after a second-half rally by black.


Luna Tixs jamming

MVP awards went to jammers Ms. Infidel and Swagger Jackie, and blockers Luna Tixs and Nori Spekt. Many thanks to Cherry City, Lava City, PG&E, and all of our officials and volunteers.

Debutante Brawl

Big things are happening at Sick Town! On Sept. 20, our three new home teams played their first bout, the aptly-named “Debutante Brawl.”

The Dis-Orderlies, Pandemics and Trauma Queens fought it out in three round-robin mini bouts. Although all three teams played with heart and tenacity. In the end, the Trauma Queens were the big winners, followed by the Pandemics.

Several skaters and one referee made their literal bout debuts. On the Dis-Orderlies, Panda Moanium, Loretta Spynn and OG Tush earned their “first bout” badges; on the Pandemics, the lone newbie was Eigen Vixen; Pestilence made her debut with the Trauma Queens; and finally, Canon Garner skated his first bout as a referee.


Vixen jamming

Every skater was cheering for Canon, who started in October, 2013, and had to learn to skate from the ground up. We’ve watched Canon go from “Bambi on ice” to a strong skater and confident ref, and it’s been a joy to see.

“Now that I’ve gotten one under my belt, and made a correct call, I have a lot more confidence in myself,” Canon says.


Canon reffing

Among the ladies, everyone enjoyed the camaraderie of not just the teams, but the whole league. “I love how everyone is so fiercely competitive and at the same time supportive of each other,” Eigen Vixen says. All three teams focused on the league first, and the teams second, and it showed in the kindness and encouragement all of the veterans showed to the new skaters.

“I found encouragement from league skaters who I was skating with and against, as well as those in the queue for the next bout,” Pestilence says.

Of course, derby nerves will always be there, regardless of how supportive your team is. “I was calm up till an hour before the bout, and then I wanted to run,” says OG Tush. “Then it wasn’t scary at all and I just had fun.”

OG Tush

OG Tush jamming

If you missed this bout, don’t worry — the DOs, PDs and TQs will face each other again on Oct. 25. Watch our website or Facebook for details!

Sick Town home teams

Sick Town’s home teams: Trauma Queens, Dis-Orderlies, and Pandemics

Candy Striper Home Bout Debut + S*M*A*S*H Unit Double Header


In their first ever full-length bout on their home track, the Candy Stripers’ All-Star team, the Deathascopes, will host the Southern Oregon Rollergirls’ Juniors!  We’re so excited for this match up, we can barely contain ourselves!  These junior skaters have amazing skills, and it wont be long before they’re the super stars of our favorite sport.  The second bout in our double header will feature the Sick Town S*M*A*S*H Unit against a mystery opponent!  Stay tuned for more info on that.

Doors open @ 4:00pm

Bout starts @ 5:00pm

Tickets: $10 in advance for general admission; $13 at the door. VIP tickets (guaranteed front-row seating) are available at the door, $15.  General admission advance tickets can be upgraded to VIP at the door for $3.  Kids 5 and under free!

Volunteers get in free!  For more information or to volunteer, e-mail sicktownvolunteers@gmail.com (must be 18+)

We’ll have our kids’ table stocked with fun activities, a 50/50 raffle, and a fully stocked merch table.  We’ll have sweet treats by Wildflour Confectionery, a beer garden by Mazama Brewing and 2 Towns Ciderhouse, and plenty of food options.

Sick Town on the Flat Track – Double Header!!!

April26_poster_color (1)


Have you been missing derby?  We certainly have!  With the crazy snow storms canceling two of our last three bouts, we’ve been itching to get back on the track.  To make up for some lost time, we’ll be hosting a double-header!  Coming up on April 26 at the Linn County Fair & Expo, both of our teams, the S*M*A*S*H Unit and the DisOrderlies, will gear up and face off against worthy opponents.

For the first bout, our DisOrderlies will face-off against the Southern Oregon Rollergirls.  The last time these two teams met, it was a very close win for SORG.  Our DisOrderlies are hoping take the win this time with the home track advantage.

Then our S*M*A*S*H Unit will take on Lava City Roller Dolls’ Smokin’ Ashes.  These two teams face off every year, and our S*M*A*S*H skaters are hoping to make this one something to remember!

This all-ages event will feature sweets by Wildflour Confectionery, a kids’ coloring table, an opportunity for the kiddos to run around during half-time, and more.  We’ll have a beer and cider station for adults, featuring 2 Towns Cider and a selection of local craft brews and familiar domestics.  Other food and beverages will also be available.

Since we have double the action for this bout, we’ll be starting earlier than usual.  We’ll open the doors at 4:00pm, and the opening ceremonies will begin at 5:00pm.  Advanced tickets are available at Uprise Skate Shop skate shop in Corvallis, or JP’s Restaurant and Lounge in Albany, or online at Brown Paper Tickets.

Tickets: $10 in advance for general admission; $13 at the door. VIP tickets (guaranteed front-row seating) are available at the door, $15.  General admission advance tickets can be upgraded to VIP at the door for $3.  Kids 5 and under free!

Volunteers get in free!  For more information or to volunteer, e-mail sicktownvolunteers@gmail.com (must be 18+)

Derby is Coming – A bout!



Coming up on February 08, the Sick Towns Derby Dames’ very own S*M*A*S*H Unit will be taking on the Sonoma County Roller Derby‘s All-Star Travel Team, coming all the way from The North Bay Area, CA. This is going to be an action-packed, high intensity, all-ages event!

All of our home bouts are held in the Santiam Building of the Linn County Fair & Expo!

There will be kid friendly activities, including poster-making for your favorite Sick Town Derby Dame! And fun half-time activities!

For the grown-ups there will be beverages by Ninkasi Brewing and 2 Towns Cider!

Yummy treats from Wildflour Confetionery!

Don’t forget to stop by the merch table for some awesome Sick Town swag!

Doors open at 5pm; bout starts at 6pm

For advance tickets, go to Uprise Skate Shop in Corvallis or JP’s Restaurant and Lounge in Albany. You can also get them at Brown Paper Tickets!

Tickets: $10 in advance for general admission; $13 at the door. VIP tickets (guaranteed front-row seating) are available at the door only, $15.  General admission advance tickets can be upgraded to VIP at the door for $3.  Kids 5 and under free!

Volunteers get in free!  For more information or to volunteer, e-mail sicktownvolunteers@gmail.com (must be 18+)

Summer of Shove – S*M*A*S*H Unit vs. Andromedolls


Sick Town’s S*M*A*S*H Unit faces the Andromedolls (an Emerald City home team), an otherworldly opponent! Festivities will begin with a mini bout featuring the Sick Town Candy Stripers.

General Admission – $10 in advance; $13 at the door
VIP – $12 in advance; $15 at the door

As always, we’ll have Ninkasi and 2 Towns Cider on tap to quench your thirst, Wildflour Confectionery goodies to nom, tons of great merch, a kids’ table, and much more!

S*M*A*S*H Unit vs. Church of Sk8in’ + Junior Derby Debut!


It’s bout time again, and you’re in for a real treat!  The evening’s festivities will begin with our junior league, Candy Stripers Junior Derby, debuting their skills on the home court with a 30-minute mini bout!  These young athletes are the future of roller derby, and will knock you over with their determination – super stars in the making!  For the main event, our Sick Town S*M*A*S*H Unit will take on the Church of Sk8in’, one of 3 home teams with ECRG.

Advance general admission tickets are available for $10 at The Uprise Skate Shop and Aqua Seafood & Steaks in Corvallis, or Abby’s Pizza in Albany, or at Brown Paper Tickets!  General admission tickets at the door are $13, or $10 with a military ID.  VIP tickets are available for $12 in advance or $15 at the door, and guarantee you a front row bleacher seat.  Kids 5 and under are FREE!

Enjoy beverages from our sponsors, Ninkasi Brewing and 2 Towns Ciderhouse, and treat yourself to delicious goodies from Wildflour Confectionery; we’ll also have traditional concession fare!  Our kids’ table will be open during the entire event, along with our DIY sign table and the merch booth.

S*M*A*S*H Unit vs. ECRG’s Flat Track Furies – VICTORY!

This past Saturday, the Sick Town S*M*A*S*H Unit took on the Flat Track Furies, a hometeam from the Emerald City Roller Girls.  It’s been about 2 years since the two teams met on Sick Town’s own turf, and last time, the Furies took home the win.

This time, though, the S*M*A*S*H Unit brought some serious pain, and ended the bout victorious with a 43-point lead!  Despite missing two top jammers and two top blockers, the Sick Town skaters exhibited top-notch strategy, tight walls, and damaging hits.  This bout was a fantastic opportunity for some of our newer skaters to hone their skills.

You can read more about the double-header, and see more great photos, here – Daily Emerald Covers Sick Town Bout!  And don’t miss our bouts later this season against ECRG’s other home teams, the Church of Sk8in’ (April 13) and the Andromedolls (June 15)!

And if you’re into stats, or just can’t get enough information about your Sick Town’s S*M*A*S*H Unit, check out Flat Track Stats!  This is an amazing resource for getting to know the intimate details of our team’s bout history.  The stats go back to the very beginning of our competitive career, and give a great overview of how far we’ve come!

2012 Season Recap!

As Sick Town gets back into the swing of regular practices to prepare for our first bout of the new 2013 Season, we take a moment to recap last season’s exciting bout action.

  • January 29:  Oly Dropkick Donnas vs. S*M*A*S*H Unit, 198 – 48: Coming back from our winter break is never easy; the Dropkick Donnas took full advantage and did some serious damage to our SMASH Unit.  We left with a few injuries, but also with some great experience, memories, and stories.  We knew we would have to really step up our game for our next bout against them coming up in December!  See how that turned out below.
  • March 10: Sick Pistols vs. Country Club Crushers, 135 – 113:  For our first home bout of the season, we pitted Sick Town against Sick Town, dividing our bout pool of skaters into two teams.  A close game to the end, this bout was a great opportunity for non-chartered skaters to play.
  • April 28: LCRD Smokin’ Ashes vs. S*M*A*S*H Unit, 225 – 59: As always, Lava City brought their A-game, and gave us a good time both on and off the track.  We love LCRD because they always have new things to teach us, and always make us work!
  • May 19: Rainy City All-Stars vs. S*M*A*S*H Unit, 112 – 118: Our first win of the season, this bout was a close one from start to finish.  We last saw Rainy City at Knocktoberfest in 2011, and we’ve both come a long way since then.
  • June 09: LCRD Smokin’ Ashes vs. S*M*A*S*H Unit, 129 – 97: Our second bout this season against the Lava City ladies wasn’t technically a win, but our S*M*A*S*H Unit certainly felt vindicated!  We knocked off 160 points from the point differential between these two games.  In just a few short weeks, we totally overhauled our game.
  • September 29: Skatemberfest IV: Southern Oregon Rollergirls vs. S*M*A*S*H UNIT, 64 – 248:  After a few months of summer break, our S*M*A*S*H Unit wanted to start the second half of the season with a strong showing of skills and strategy.  Success!
  • October 27: Lilac City Roller Girls vs. S*M*A*S*H Unit, 163 – 165:  This bout was a nail-biter until the end!  In a very close match-up, the teams fought back and forth for the lead from start to finish.  The win was anyone’s guess, until our S*M*A*S*H Unit pulled out the win!
  • December 08: Oly Mash-Up Team vs. S*M*A*S*H Unit, 174 – 175:  We couldn’t have asked for a more exciting season finale than this bout!  Meeting up with some of our stiffest competition from the beginning of the season, we had our work cut out for us.  The S*M*A*S*H Unit was trailing behind a decent chunk of points in the second half, but some amazing jams in the final minutes of the game left the audience with 10 breathless minutes before the final score was announced; there wasn’t a single butt in the seats as the crowd cheered our glorious victory!